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| I take some time to realizse your folly
Yet somehow i hate you more instead
Your bewitching barrage of heart-shaped lies
Has left me all but cold and dead
But somehow when i think my hate
Completes and cant grow any more
You apologise and compliment my eyes
And once again i hit the floor
In the hour of my weakness i ask myself
How can i fall for this again
When you front your shallow charm
Still my heart you always rend
Mistakes i make with you they tell
of a time when feelings kept me alive
Its over now you've broken me
And in my solace your watching thrives
My strength is gone yet fight i will
Unwanted at best these feelings i know
Fighting i am and will be still
When called by death to god i go
~~~i pity the fool, paco
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| fighting the fall
a stallions heart, beyond compare
measure or murder
trapped in the body of a 17 year old girl
keep me going, run me ragged
he's out of the race
but she's still running, way behind
there is no finish line
but you can still win by dropping out too
dont be a trophy for his wall
self sacrifice
drop the ball and self invent
the chain is broken but you are blind
criminal intent
its all he needs but still wont suffice
maybe bliss if i crawl away
find a nook where i'm content
users beware
fighting the fall is a whole new trip
worth every cent that is paid in blood
freedom rings throughout the halls
this is a piece of work about a friend of mine. i talked to her and she inspired me to write this but i dont think that she even knows that this is about her! this is just a story about the hardships that people face in relationships and if you read it a second time, you will see what i am talking about.
---i cant believe its not mark! | | |
| -Traveling the Road-
You're walking down the road of life,
Living through hardship and strife.
Many years may pass you by,
Before you take your final sigh.
The good, the bad, the easy, the tough,
The time right now just seems so rough.
Patience and faith may bring you ease,
Past the potholes and through the trees.
Never knowing what's around the bend,
Because your road might just suddenly e
n
d. | | |
| Too late to save face
In
this fortress of delusion i call myself, i find solace in
the thought of my pity, the pity i hold for your imaginary broken form
that i left behind. my heart bleeds in vain for the lost moments i
spent following a dictator i could not see, the dictator that controls
me from beyond the grave now, the dictator that keeps my emotion
hostage and makes a mockery of my feeble attempts at freedom, the
dictator that is you.acception of my present state of denial is the
only route to the temporary smile that may occasionally cross my face,
turning in cowardace from the lovely world that it once knew and
greeted at the break of each morning. Temporary though it may be,
it is
a door to the world of the living, a glimpse of what i once took for
granted, serenity and freedom from the constant burden of the thoughts
of you that bog down my depressed mind each day. The permanence
of this
dream has become a transparent reality for me now, i fail to see that
it will only overshadow and contain my hate for so long until once
again it is free and i am miserable, hating my actions which i will
still continue to do despite my resistance and imminent death all over
again. The things that i think of, indeed the things that i will
never
again be free of may seem like a blessing at first; deception is a
beautiful thing. A gift is your pleasent occasional thought that
is
like a picture of you sitting in a window of bloody thorns; thorns
covered in my blood. Every attempt i made at you, the strife i
went
through for your affection was all in vain because every time i moved
forewards, you shut the window and i fell on the thorns of your
hatred. Why did i not see it before that you were shutting me out
of your life,
your provocative actions inhibited my judgement of your obvious anxiety
yet my eyes were blinded by my rejected love that i myself could not
see.
this is the story of my life, take a second look at
it so that you can see the meaning of the lines. if you dont, you have
just wasted my time. i dont know if i should call this a poem or not,
it was what i wanted to write in my journal so it came out that way, if
you dont like it, lick my nuts...
---now with 35% more free, mark
| | |
| stomping out the flames
this is my seppuku
i will end it now
save my dignity
cut off the head
and the body will die
will i have
peace afterwards?
my heart knows
allthough the
bitterness builds
serenity will happen
by and by
and though my
life may end
my soul will
find peace.
-mark
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